Mom Taught Me

My Mother taught me LOGIC:

- If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me.

My Mother taught me MEDICINE:

- If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way.

My Mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD:

- If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!

My Mother taught me ESP:

- Put your sweater on; don't you think that I know when you're cold?

My Mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE:

- What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you... Don't talk back to me!

My Mother taught me HUMOR:

- When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.

My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:

- If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.

My mother taught me about GENETICS:

- You are just like your father!

My mother taught me about my ROOTS:

- Do you think you were born in a barn?

My mother taught me about the WISDOM of AGE:

- When you get to be my age, you will understand.

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION:

- Just wait until your father gets home.

My mother taught me about RECEIVING:

- You are going to get it when we get home.

And, my all-time favorite - JUSTICE:

- One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU -- then you'll see what it's like!