Women Jokes

How can you tell if your girlfriend is frigid?
→ When you open her legs the lights go on.

What two things in the air will get a woman pregnant?
→ Her legs.

What is the similarity between a woman and a washing machine?
→ They both leak when they're fucked!

How can you tell when your girlfriend's horny?
→ You stick your hands in her panties and it feels like you're feeding a horse.

Three guys are discussing women.

"I like to watch a woman's tits best," the first guy says.

The second says, "I like to look at a woman's ass."

He asks the third guy, "What about you?"

"Me? I prefer to see the top of her head."

What's the best thing about a blow job?
→ The 15 minutes of silence!

How do you make love to a fat girl?
→ Roll her in flour and go for the wet spot.

Did you hear about the woman who only had two chances to get pregnant?
→ She blew them both...

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
→ Just when it's getting interesting they are finished until next time...

Why do Black widow spiders kill their mates after mating?
→ To stop the snoring before it starts..