Travel Jokes

What do you call a man with a double decker bus on his head?
→ The deceased!

What "bus" crossed the ocean?
→ Columbus.

What is the difference between a bus driver and a cold?
→ One knows the stops, the other stops the nose.

Which end of a bus is it best to get off?
→ It doesn't matter. Both ends stop.

Have you seen the bus website?
→ Yes - it's just the ticket!

- Janet: What's the difference between a cake and a school bus?

- Jill: I don't know.

- Janet: I'm glad I didn't send you to pick up my birthday cake!

'Is everyone in the bus?' asked the driver before he closed the door.

'No,' called a lady, 'wait until I get my clothes on.'

All the passengers in the bus turned towards the door to look at the woman. She got on with a bag full of laundry.

- Conductor, do you stop at the Savoy Hotel?

- I should say not, on my salary!

Does this bus stop at the river?
→ If it doesn't there'll be a very big splash.

Do buses and trains run on time?
→ Usually, yes.

No, they don't. Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks.