Men Jokes

What's a man idea of helping with the housework?
→ Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.

How many men does it take to make popcorn?
→ Four, one to hold the pot, and three to act macho and shake the stove.

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
→ No one knows, it's never happened.

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?
→ A chauffeur.

Why do so few men end up in Heaven?
→ They never stop to ask directions.

How are men like carpet tiles?
→ If you lay them properly the first time around, you can walk all over them for the rest of your life.

Why does a man only get half-hour lunch-breaks?
→ So his boss doesn't have to retrain him.

Where's the safest place to hide money from a man?
→ Under the soap

When do men insist that women are illogical?
→ When a woman doesn't agree with them.

How do you confuse a man?
→ You don't - they're born that way.