Men Jokes

When can you dive in a swimming pool and not get your hair wet?
→ When your bald!

Why did the bald man go outside?
→ To get some fresh hair!

- Doctor, Doctor my hair keeps falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in?

- Yes, here is a paper bag!

- How much for a haircut?

- Barber: Fifteen dollars.

- How much for a shave?

- Barber: Ten dollars.

- Right - shave my head.

Why do bald-headed men never use keys?
→ Because they've lost their locks.

- Doctor, doctor, can you give me something for my baldness?

- How about a few pounds of pig manure?

- Will that cure my baldness?

- No, but with that on your head no one will come near enough to notice you're bald.

What's your dad getting for Christmas?
→ Bald and fat.

- Look at that bald man over there.

- It's the first time I've seen a parting with ears.

- First boy: My dad saw a horrible witch and didn't turn a hair!

- Second boy: I'm not surprised - your dad's bald!

A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine." The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes.

The cowboy said, "Young lady, you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room."

She replied, "I'm married and my husband wouldn't like that."

The cowboy said, "Tell him your working overtime and I'll pay you the difference."

She said, "You tell him. He is the one shaving you."