Doctor Jokes

The Doctor was puzzled. "I'm very sorry but I can't diagnose your trouble, Mahoney. I think it must be drink."

"Don't worry about it Dr. Kelley, I'll come back when you're sober."

- Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a python.

- You can't get round me just like that, you know!

- Doctor, Doctor I think I'm an electric eel

- That's shocking!

- Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a bridge

- What's come over you?

- Oh, two cars, a large truck and a coach.

- Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a woodworm

- How boring for you!

- Doctor, Doctor You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands shaking

- Do you drink a lot?

- Not really - I spill most of it!

- Doctor, Doctor, I can't get to sleep.

- Sit on the edge of the bed and you'll soon drop off.

- Doctor Doctor I'm so ugly what can I do about it?

- Hire yourself out for Halloween parties!

- Doctor, Doctor what did the x-ray of my head show?

- Absolutely nothing!

- Doctor, Doctor I'm having trouble with my breathing.

- I'll give you something that will soon put a stop to that!