Blonde Jokes

Why were blondes created?
→ Because sheep can't bring beer from the fridge

What did the blonde say when the docter told her one leg was bigger than the other?
→ Like, Not even!

A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it.

One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."

"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car."

"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter on your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore."

The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"

"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"

When blondes have more fun, do they know it?

There are three girls in the Fifth Grade. There is a blonde a brunette and a redhead.

Which one is the probably the smartest?
→ If you guessed the blonde you were correct.... she's 19 years old!

One day a burnette and a blond lady were walking through the park. All-of-a-sudden, the burnette stops and says "Awe, look at the poor dead birdy." The blond looks up and says "Where!?"

Why do blondes where underwear?
→ To keep their ankles warm.

Two brunettes and a blonde are having lunch at a cafe, all three are pregnant. Through out the coversation the topic of sex and pregnancy comes up, finally culminating in each one discussing their respective fetus' and the manner of conception.

The first brunette says "I know I am going to have a boy because I was on top."

The second brunette says "I know I am going to have a girl because I was on the bottom."

The blonde is silent, she has a stricken look on her face, finally she bursts out "Oh my god, I'm going to have a puppy".

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
→ What's a light bulb?

A blonde dies and goes to the pearly gates of heaven to meet Saint Peter...

He first tells her that the only way she can get through the gate is to pass a quite simple test.

"What is The Son Of God's name?" he asks.

She thinks for a minute, rubbing her chin in deep thought. "Andy!" She bursts out with a gleaming smile.

"No, I'm sorry that is incorrect, what made you say that?" he asks.

She starts singing... "Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, andy tells me..."