Blonde Jokes

How do you know a blonde has just lost her virginity?
→ Her crayons are still sticky.

Why does a blonde have curtains on her PC?
→ To open windows

Three Blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said "Disneyland -- "Left", so they turned around and went home.

A drunken blonde goes into a bar. The bartender asks her what she would like, and she replies, "Gimme a beer." The bartender then asks, "Anheuser-Busch?" To which she replies, "Fine thanks, and how's your cock?"

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies?
→ Three...one to mix the batter and two to squeeze the rabbit.

And more on blondes...

But why do brunettes take the pill?
→ Wishful Thinking.

What does a blonde say after sex?
→ Thanks Guys.

What's the difference between a blond and a mosquito?
→ A mosquito stops sucking once you whack it.

(This joke requires the use a small visual. I'll describe the visual first, then as I tell the joke I'll cue you when to use it)

Visual: Stretch your arms straight out sideways with hands also stretched wide open.

Why did the blonde want to date Jesus?
→ She heard he was (use visual) HUNG LIKE THIS!!!!

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car.

Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting.

The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver--"PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "SCARF!"