Animal Jokes

What's got four legs and no ears?
→ Mike Tyson's dog.

Two women, who are dog owners, are arguing which dog is smarter:

- My dog is so smart. Every morning he waits for the paperboy to come around and then he takes a newspaper and brings it to me.

- I know.

- How?

- My dog told me.

Advertisement: Dog for sale. Really gentle. Eats anything. Especially fond of children.

What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise?
→ A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper!

Why does the Hound of the Baskervilles turn round and round before he lies down for the night?
→ Because he's the watchdog and he has to wind himself up.

Why did the dog jump into the sea?
→ He wanted to chase the catfish!

What do you get when you cross a Doberman with a bird?
→ A Doberman fincher!

What would you get if you crossed a chicken with a dog?
→ A hen that lays pooched eggs.

What dog rides a horse named Macaroni?
→ Yankee poodle!

What is the best way to follow a lost dog's paw prints?
→ With a track-tor!