Becoming A Real Man

Guest

Joke

A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in: Becoming A Real Man. That's right, in just six trimesters, you, too, can be a real man-as well as earn an MA Degree (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

First Year

Autumn Schedule

MEN 101--Combating Stupidity
MEN 102--You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103--PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104--We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule

MEN 110--Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111--Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4 am
MEN 112--Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100--Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101--Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A--What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule

MEN 120--How NOT to Act Like a Butt face When You're Wrong
MEN 121--Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122--YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123--Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C--What Was Yours is Hers

Second Year

Autumn Schedule

SEX 101--You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102--Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103--How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201--How to Put the Toilet Seat Down
Elective--See Electives Below)

Winter Schedule

MEN 210--The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211--How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212--You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213--Believe Me, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A--Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 1

Spring Schedule

MEN 220--Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221--Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2
MEN 222--Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223--Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay

Course Electives

EAT 101--Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102--Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103--Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231--Mothers-in-law
MEN 232--Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233--Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C--Cheaper to Keep Her

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