Great To Be A Woman

Reasons why it's great to be a woman

- Free drinks.

- Free dinners.

- Free movies.

- Speeding ticket? What's that?

- New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.

- If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out loud.

- If you're not making enough money you can blame the glass ceiling.

- You can sleep your way to the top.

- You can sue the President for sexual harassment.

- It's possible to live your whole life without ever taking a group shower.

- No fashion faux pas you make could rival The Speedo.

- Brad Pitt.

- No one passes out when you take off your shoes.

- Excitement is only as far away as the nearest beauty-supply store.

- If you forget to shave, no one has to know.

- If you're dumb, some people will find it cute.

- You have the ability to dress yourself.

- If you marry someone twenty years younger, you're aware that you look like an idiot.

- You'll never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist.

- You can quickly end any fight by crying.

- Your friends won't think you're weird if you ask whether there's spinach in your teeth.

- There are times when chocolate really Can solve all your problems.

- You've never had a goatee.

- You'll never regret piercing your ears.

- You can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

- You know which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.

- You get to hate Kathie Lee in the way only another woman truly can.