Women Jokes

"My boyfriend says I look like a dishy Italian!" said Miss Conceited.
"Then he's right," said her little brother. "Sophia Loren?"
"No-spaghetti!"

What is yellow and goes click-click?
→ A ball-point banana.

- Witch: Will I lose my looks as I get older?

- Wizard: With luck, yes.

Did you hear about the witch who did a four year course in ugliness?
→ She finished it in two.

What happened when the witch went for a job as a TV presenter?
→ The producer said she had the perfect face for radio.

Don't look out of the window, Betty, people will think it's Halloween.

- I've just come back from the beauty parlour.

- Pity it was closed!

A witch went into a beauty parlor and asked the assistant how much it would cost to make her look like a film star.

"Nothing," replied the assistant.
"Nothing?" she asked, "but how can I look like a film star?"
"Haven't you seen a film called The Creature from the Black Lagoon?" replied the assistant.

- First witch: My beauty is timeless.

- Second witch: Yes, it could stop a clock.

- They say Margaret is a raving beauty.

- You mean she's escaped from the funny farm?

- Mrs Saggy: Mrs Wrinkly tried to have a facelift last week.

- Mrs Baggy: Tried to?

- Mrs Saggy: Yes, they couldn't find a crane strong enough to lift her face!