Animal Jokes

Why didn't the dog speak to his foot?
→ Because it's not polite to talk back to your paw!

What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers?
→ A bud hound!

What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?
→ A dingo-ling!

What do you call a happy Lassie?
→ A jolly collie!

What dogs are best for sending telegrams?
→ Wire haired terriers!!

Where did the dog breeder keep his savings?
→ In bark-lays bank!

- Small girl: I'd buy that dog, but his legs are too short!

- Clerk: Too short? Why, all four of them touch the floor.

Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat and one says to the other:

- I hear that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs.

- Odd, but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do - her companion replies.

Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward him.

- Two dogs, please - says one.

The vendor is only too pleased to oblige and he wraps both hot dogs in oil. Excited, the nuns hurry over to a bench and begin to unwrap their 'dogs.' The mother superior is first to open hers.
Staring at it for a moment, she leans over to the other nun and whispers cautiously:

- What part did you get?

Why does a dog wag it's tail?
→ No one else will do it for them

What side of the dog has the most fur?
→ The Outside.