Animal Jokes

How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster?
→ Terrier-fied!

What dog do other dogs go to when they are sick?
→ A docs-hund!

What do you get when you cross a collie with a trumpet?
→ A Lassie who plays brassie!

What is the best kind of dog to direct traffic at a busy intersection?
→ A pointer!

What kind of dog doesn't do well in hot weather?
→ A faint Bernard!

- Every time I tell my English Setter to stop barking, it never does!

- What does it do?

- It just stands on its back two legs and quotes Shakespeare!

- What?

- Yeah, it says:

- To bark or not to bark that is the question! and keeps on barking!

What do you get when you cross a sled dog with an elephant?
→ A tusky!

What dog wears a white coat and does science experiments?
→ Labs!

What kind of dog can tell time?
→ A clockshund!

What kind of dog always needs a shave?
→ A bearded collie!