Newest jokes

When fish play football, who is the captain?
→ The team's kipper!

Fishing season hasn't opened and a fisherman who doesn't have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks:

- Any luck?

- Any luck? This is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday - he boasts.

- Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am? - asks the stranger.

- Nope.

- Well, meet the new game warden.

- Oh - gulped the fisherman.

- Well, do you know who I am?

- Nope.

- Meet the biggest liar in the state!

What did Noah do while spending time on the ark?
→ Fished, but he didn't catch much. He only had two worms!

What sort of net is useless for catching fish?
→ A football net!

What is the difference between a fisherman and a lazy student?
→ One baits his hook, the other hates his book.

Have you seen the new fishing website?
→ No, it's not online yet.

George went fishing, but at the end of the day he had not caught one fish. On the way back to camp, he stopped at a fish store.

- I want to buy three trout - he said to the owner.

- But instead of putting them in a bag, throw them to me.

- Why should I do that? - the owner asked.

- So I can tell everyone that I caught three fish!

- Lee: I just swallowed a fish bone!

- Counselor: Are you choking?

- Lee: No, I'm serious!

How many South Dakotans does it take to go ice fishing?
→ Four. One to cut the hole in the ice, and three to push the boat through.

How many anglers does it take to change a light bulb?
→ Four, one to change the light bulb and three to brag about how big the old one was and about the one that they would have changed, but "It got away"