Newest jokes

Fred wrote in her homework book: Margarine is butter made from imitation cows.

- And what's your name? - the secretary asked the next new boy.

- Butter.

- I hope your first name's not Roland - smirked the secretary.

- No, ma'am. It's Brendan.

How do you know that a elephant's been in the fridge?
→ There are foot prints in the butter.

What do cannibals eat for breakfast?
→ Buttered host.

Two flies were on a cornflakes packet.

- Why are we running so fast? - asked one.

- Because - said the second - it says 'tear along the dotted line'!

Two flies were on a cornflakes packet.

- Why are we running so fast? - asked one.

- Because - said the second - it says 'tear along the dotted line'!

What looks just like half a loaf of bread?
→ Its other half.

- Why can't you make bread like my mother?

- I would if you could make dough like your father!

- Have you heard the story about the loaf of bread?

- No.

- Oh, crumbs.

- They say she has a sharp tongue.

- Yes, she can slice bread with it.