Newest jokes

What does a monster do when he loses his head?
→ He calls a head hunter.

What do you call a monster with two wooden heads?
→ Edward Woodward.

How do you tell a good monster from a bad one?
→ If it's a good one you will be able to talk about it later!

What does a polite monster say when he meets you for the first time?
→ Pleased to eat you!

What do you call a monster with a wooden head?
→ Edward.

Why did the monster stop playing with his brother?
→ He got tired of kicking him around.

What do you call a mouse that can pick up a monster?
→ Sir.

- Monster: Someone told me Dr Frankenstein invented the safety match.

- Igor: Yes, that was one of his most striking achievements.

What happened when Dr Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
→ He got atomic ache.

- Igor: Only this morning Dr Frankenstein completed another amazing operation. He crossed an ostrich with a centipede.

- Dracula: And what did he get?

- Igor: We don't know - we haven't managed to catch it yet.