Newest jokes

Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment?
→ A mental hospital.

If men had PMS, what would happen?
a) The federal government would allocate funds to study it.
b) Cramps would become an acceptable reason to apply for permanent disability.
c) There would be a federal holiday every 28 days.
d) All of the above.

How are men like UFOs?
→ You don't know where they come from, what their mission is, or what time they're going to take off.

What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?
→ When the power goes off.

What is a macho man?
→ After getting a blow job, he asks the woman, 'Was it as good for you, as it was for me?'

Why are men like blenders?
→ You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

Why is urine yellow and sperm white?
→ So men can tell if they are coming or going.

Billy was 14 and just started jerkin off. He loved to jerk off. However, one day, his dad walked in on him while he was jerkin off! Billy was so embarrassed. He pulled up his pants as quick as he could. But, his dad already seen him.

- Billy, doing that will make you go blind

- Dad, I'm over here!

What's the ultimate rejection?
→ When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

What do most men think Mutual Orgasm is?
→ An insurance company.