Tooth Fairy Form Letter

Dear:

Thank you for leaving [01] tooth under your pillow last night.

While we make every attempt to leave a monetary reward in the case of lost or stolen children's teeth, we were unable to process your request for the following reason(s) indicated below:

• ( ) the tooth could not be found
• ( ) it was not a human tooth
• ( ) we do not think that pieces of chicken bone are very funny
• ( ) we were unable to approach the tooth due to excessive odor
• ( ) the tooth has previously been redeemed for cash
• ( ) the tooth did not originally belong to you
• ( ) the tooth fairy does not process fingernails
• ( ) your request has been forwarded to the Nerve Ending Fairy for appropriate action
• ( ) you were overheard to state that you do not believe in the tooth fairy
• ( ) you are age 12 or older at the time your request was received
• ( ) the tooth is still in your mouth
• ( ) the tooth was guarded by a vicious fairy-eating dog at the time of our visit
• ( ) no nightlight was on at the time of our visit
• ( ) the snacks provided for the tooth fairy were not satisfactory, or were missing
• ( ) we discovered evidence of unsafe tooth extraction as follows:
• [ ] string
• [ ] pliers
• [ ] gunpowder
• [ ] hammer marks
• [ ] chisel
• [ ] part of skull attached to tooth
• [ ] no dental care
• ( ) other:

Instead of the usual cash redemption, we have provided the following certificate which you may attempt to exchange at a retail store near you. Thank you for your request, and we look forward to serving you in the future.

Sincerely,
The Tooth Fairy