Three Limericks

Although Cupid got all the girls hot,
a great lover himself he was not.
They would say, "Sorry, sport,
but your arrow's too short--
What we want is what Hercules' got."

Euphemism is all very well,
but if I really am going to hell,
I'd rather it be for lechery,
not for "loving the ladies too well."

Juno's measure of fury was full,
but Zeus had a trick he could pull.
He said, "Surely, my dear,
whatever you hear
from Europa is all cock and bull."

Oh a pussy's a timorous beast,
needing petting and patience at least,
but she'll alter completely,
if handled quite sweetly,
and sit up and roar when she's greased.