Bejeweled Portrait

Mrs. Whembleton decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant."

"But, Madam, you are not wearing any of those things."

"True enough," said Mrs. Whembleton. "If I should predecease my dear husband I know he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go stark raving mad looking for the jewelry!"