Clinton Top Ten

From David Letterman and the Late Show...

Top Ten Signs Bill Clinton Doesn't Give A Damn

10. Called Russia asking if they need a new spy
11. When people whisper, "Your fly is open," he says, "Yeah, I know"
12. Shoplifts at will, gives finger to security camera
13. If you asked what he had for breakfast and he actually had waffles, he'll say "pancakes" just for the fun of lying
14. He's no longer just fat -- he's now Hugh Rodham fat
15. "Tubby" is selling a copy of the Declaration of Indepence on eBay
16. Doesn't even bother to buy high-quality cigars anymore
17. Recently introduced Playboy playmate as "my lovely wife"
18. Refers to Chappaqua mansion as "the house that dirty pardon money built"
19. Sits in the back of Al Gore's journalism class screaming, "Loser!"