Insurance Claim Statements

The following are actual statements found in insurance forms where drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words.

- Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

- I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.

- A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

- A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

- The guy was all over the road, I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

- I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.

- I attempted to kill a fly, and I drove into a telephone pole.

- I had been driving for forty years, when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

- I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble and my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident.

- To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

- An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

- I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull.

- The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

- I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.

- In indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

- I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray dogs.

- The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.