Signs of the Wrong Bank

Letterman's Top Ten Signs You're Doing Business With The Wrong Bank:

10. When you make a deposit, tellers high-five each other.
11. After you get a free toaster, bank president shows up at your house begging for toast.
12. Your monthly statements are handwritten, in crayon.
13. When you want to make a withdrawal, clerks suddenly don't speak English.
14. You notice Kato Kaelin is sleeping in the vault.
15. Your safety deposit box is a Dunkin' Donuts carton wrapped in tin foil.
16. All cash deposits go directly into teller's pants.
17. Lobby is waist-deep in Mexican pesos.
18. Toll-free customer service line is: 1-800-GET-HOSED.
19. Four words: Bank President Rosa Lopez