Male Stages of Life

Drink

• 17: beer
• 25: bourbon
• 35: vodka
• 48: double vodka
• 66: Maalox

Seduction Line

• 17: My parents are away for the weekend.
• 25: My girlfriend is away for the weekend.
• 35: My fiancee is away for the weekend.
• 48: My wife is away for the weekend.
• 66: My second wife is dead.

Favorite Sport

• 17: sex
• 25: sex
• 35: sex
• 48: sex
• 66: napping

Definition of a Successful Date

• 17: "tongue"
• 25: "breakfast"
• 35: "She didn't set back my therapy."
• 48: "I didn't have to meet her kids."
• 66: "Got home alive."

Favorite Fantasy

• 17: getting to third
• 25: airplane sex
• 35: menage a trois
• 48: taking the company public
• 66: Swiss maid/Nazi love slave

What's the Ideal Age to Get Married?

• 17: 25
• 25: 35
• 35: 48
• 48: 66
• 66: 17

Ideal Date

• 17: Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in
• 25: "Split the check before we go back to my place"
• 35: "Just come over."
• 48: "Just come over and cook."
• 66: Sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas.