This 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years, had died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to her interest in health food, and exercise.
When they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter took them to their mansion which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen and master bath suite and Jacuzzi. As they "oohed and aahed" the old man asked Peter how much all this was…
One day while walking down the street a highly successful executive woman was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.
- Welcome to Heaven - said St. Peter.
- Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once had an executive make it this far and we're not really sure what to…
One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.
About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to…
Many years ago, a fisherman's wife blessed her husband with twin sons. They loved the children very much, but couldn't think of what to name their children. Finally, after several days, the fisherman said:
- Let's not decide on names right now. If we wait a little while, the names will simply occur to us.
After several weeks had passed, the fisherman and his wife noticed a peculiar fact. When left alone, one of the…
Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted a kitten for Christmas. Her mother couldn't buy a kitten and parcel it up for Christmas Day, so she bought it a week before Christmas and gave it to the little girl.
- You're getting your Christmas present a week early this year - her mother explained as she handed over the fluffy little tabby kitten.
- Is that what you want?
The little girl said:
An American businessman was at a pier in a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow-fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied only a little while.
The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish?
A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands:
- Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I'm so mad, I can't even see straight.
The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and says:
- Gimme another one.
The bartender pours the drink, but says:
- Now, before I give you this, why don't you let off a little…
Every night, after dinner, a man took off for the local tavern. He spent the whole evening there, and arrived home very drunk around midnight each night.
He always had trouble getting his key into the keyhole and getting the door opened. His wife, waiting up for him, would go to the door and let him in. Then she would proceed to yell and scream at him, for his constant nights out, and coming home in a drunken state…
There once was an accountant who lived her whole life without ever taking advantage of any of the people she worked for. In fact, she made sure that every job she did resulted in a win-win situation.
One day while walking down the street she was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.
- Welcome to Heaven - said St. Peter.
Once upon a time there was a beautiful oil company.
All day long she loved to run up and down the share price list, laughing and skipping. But one day she was very sad, because she couldn't find an interim dividend anywhere and she knew people would be very angry if she couldn't produce it.
- What's wrong, little oil company? - said a gruff voice nearby.
She looked around and there was a funny little creature with…
